Posts Tagged ‘Monster Jokes’

Frankenstein Jokes

Frankenstein Jokes

Just bolt into these monster funny Frankenstein Jokes?

Frankenstein Head Shaped Jumbo Foil BalloonSquishy Frankenstein Adult MaskBobble Head Monster Kids CostumeUniversal Studios Monsters Frankenstein Child Costume

 

Dr Frankenstein. How can I stop that monster charging?
Igor:Why not take away his credit card?

What’s the difference between Frankenstein and boiled potatoes?
You can’t mash Frankenstein.

Did you hear what happened to Frankenstein’s monster?
He was stopped for speeding, fined £150 and dismantled for six months.

IGOR: Why is Baron Frankenstein such good fun?
MONSTER: Because he soon has you in stitches.

Frankenstein Jokes - Halloween JokesWhy was Baron Frankenstein never lonely?
Because he was good at making friends.

FIRST MONSTER: The bride of Frankenstein has a lovely face.
SECOND MONSTER: If you can read between the lines.

What kind of book did Frankenstein’s monster like to read?
One with a cemetery plot.

Why did Doctor Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills.

What was the inscription on the tomb of Frankenstein’s monster?
HERE LIES FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER. MAY HE REST IN PIECES.

Who brings monsters’ babies?
Frankenstork.

What happened to Frankenstein’s monster on the road?

He was stopped for speeding, fined $50 and dismantled for six months.

How did Frankenstein’s monster eat his lunch?
He bolted it down.

What does Frankenstein’s monster call a screwdriver?
Daddy.

Who brings the monsters their babies?
Frankenstork.

Why did Frankenstein’s monster give up boxing?
Because he didn’t want to spoil his looks.

What did Frankenstein’s monster say when he was struck by lightning?
‘Great! That was just what I needed.’

What should you do if you find yourself in the same room as Frankenstein, Dracula, a werewolf, a vampire and a coven of witches?
Keep your fingers crossed that it’s a fancy dress party.

Frankenstein JokesWhere does the bride of Frankenstein have her hair done?
At the ugly parlour.

What happened to Frankenstein’s stupid son?
He had so much wax in his ears that he became a permanent contributor to Madame Tussaud’s.

What did one of Frankenstein’s ears say to the other?
I didn’t know we lived on the same block.

How does Frankenstein sit in his chair?
Bolt upright.

How did Dr Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster?

On a piece rate.

What did Dr Frankenstein get when he put his goldfish’s brain in the body of his dog?

I don’t know, but it is great at chasing submarines.

What do you call a clever monster?
Frank Einstein.

What happened when the ice monster had a furious row with the zombie?
He gave him the cold shoulder.

What did Frankenstein’s monster say when he was struck by lightning?
Thanks, I needed that.

Monster: Someone told me Dr Frankenstein invented the safety match.
Igor: Yes, that was one of his most striking achievements.


Monster Jokes

Halloween Monster Jokes

Here is a collection of monster jokes for you to enjoy!

Funny Halloween jokes for MonstersWhat’s a monster’s favorite play?

Romeo and Ghouliet

Why did the monster eat a light bulb?

Because he was in need of a light snack

What kind of cereal do monsters eat?

Ghost-Toasties

Why wasn’t there any food left after the monster party?

Because everyone was a goblin!

Do monsters eat popcorn with their fingers?

NO, they eat the fingers separately.

Monster Jokes For HalloweenWhat do you do with a green monster?

Wait until it ripens.

What is a monster’s favorite food?

Ghoul scout cookies.

What’s a monsters favorite bean?

A human bean.

How do you keep a monster from biting his nails?

Replace the nails with screws.

What type of monster really loves dance music?

The boogieman!

What is a monster’s favorite food?

Ghoul scout cookies.

What position does a monster play on the soccer team?

Ghoulie.

Monster Jokes - Halloween JokesWhat kind of hot dogs do monsters like best?

Hallowieners.

What’s the name of the book of socially prominent monsters?

The Book of who’s Boo.

Why are monsters forgetful ?

Because everything goes in one ear and out the others !

Why did the monster knit herself three socks ?

Because she grew another foot !

What is the difference between a huge smelly monster and a sweet ?

People like sweets !

What has a purple spotted body, ten hairy legs and big eyes on stalks?

I don’t know either but there is one crawling up your leg !

What do you say when you meet a two headed monster ?

Hello, hello !

Halloween Jokes - Monster JokesWhat is the best way to speak to a monster ?

From a long way away !

What is big, red and prickly, has three eyes and eats rocks ?

A big, red, prickly three eyed rock eater !

What kind of monster has the best hearing ?

The eeriest !

How you can tell if you have had a monster in your fridge ?

It leaves footprints in the butter !

Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?

His ghoul friend.

Why are monsters covered in wrinkles?

Have you ever tried to iron a monster !

Halloween Monster JokesWhy are monsters green ?

Because they didn’t take their travel sickness pills !

Why do monsters wear glasses ?

So they don’t bump into other monsters !

What do you get if a huge hairy monster steps on Batman and Robin ?

Flatman and Ribbon !

What time is it when a monster sits on your car ?

Time to get a new one !

What game do monsters play with ants ?

Squash !

Did you hear about the monster who had eight arms ?

He said they came in handy !

Best Monster JokesHow do you keep an ugly monster in suspense ?

I’ll tell you tomorrow !

How do you greet a three headed monster ?

Hello, hello, hello !

What is a sea monster’s favourite dish ?

Fish and ships !

Monster: Where do fleas go in winter ?

Werewolf: Search me !

Why are monsters forgetful ?

Because everything goes in one ear and out the others !

Why did the monster knit herself three socks ?

Because she grew another foot !

What is the difference between a huge smelly monster and a sweet ?

People like sweets !

What has a purple spotted body, ten hairy legs and big eyes on stalks?

I don’t know either but there is one crawling up your leg !

Monster Halloween JokesWhat do you say when you meet a scary two headed monster ?

Bye, Bye !

What is the best way to speak to a monster ?

From a long way away !

What is big, red and prickly, has three eyes and eats rocks ?

A big, red, prickly three eyed rock eater !

Why are monsters green ?

Because they didn’t take their travel sickness pills !

Why do monsters wear glasses ?

So they don’t bump into other monsters !

What kind of monster has the best hearing ?

The eeriest !

Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?

His ghoul friend.

Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?

His ghoul friend.

What did Dr. Frankenstein get when he put his goldfish’s brain in the body of his dog?

I don’t know, but it’s great at chasing submarines.

What did the grandfather monster say to his grandson when they hadn’t seen each other for quite awhile?

You gruesome.

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