Jack-o-Lantern Jokes

Jack-o-Lantern Jokes


Jack-O-Lantern Jokes For Halloween

Why was the Jack-o-Lantern all cut up?

It was Halloween!

Why were the two pumpkins so close?

They had deep roots!

Why was the jack-o-lantern afraid to cross the road?

It had no guts!

How do Rednecks celebrate Halloween?

Pump kin!

Why Pumpkins are better than Men?

Each year you get a brand new crop to choose from.  Also, pumpkins are always on the doorstep there waiting to greet you.

What did a mad pumpkin say to his enemy?

I’ll stem on your foot!

What kind of romances do pumpkins have?

Mushy!

How do you repair a broken Jack-o-lantern?

Buy a pumpkin patch!

Why do pumpkins never quarrel?

Because they have no stomach for fighting.

When asked how he was, what did the pumpkin reply?

I’m vine, thank you.

What do you call a fat Jack-o-Lantern?

A Plumpkin!

What did one Jack-o-lantern say to the other?

Cut it out!

Why is it call a Jack-o-Lantern?

Jill rolled down the hill!

What did the pumpkin say after Halloween?

Good-Pie!

What did the pumpkin say after Thanksgiving?

Yummy Pie!

What did one Jack-o-Lantern say to the other on Halloween?

I’m feeling all warm inside tonight!

What’s the ratio of a pumpkin’s circumference to its diameter?

Pumpkin Pi  (3.1428571428571428571428571428571)

What is a pumpkin’s favorite sport?

Squash!

Pumpkin One – I’m a Jack-o- Lantern!

Pumpkin Two – No your just some pumpkin that has just had a face cut out.

Pumpkin One – I’m so cut.

What did one Jack-o-Lantern say to the other?

Got a light!

Why do Jack-o-lanterns have stupid smiles on their faces?

You’d have a stupid smile, too, if you had just had all your brains scooped out!

Why do Jack-o-Lanterns scoop out their brains before Halloween?

So the zombies don’t eat them!

What does a pumpkin pie say after a big meal?

That was filling.

What does a pumpkin sew?

A Pumpkin Patch!

 


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